The Reality of God

Summit concluded last night. Since my Freshman year, I have attended because the majority of IWU students go.

I conform. I feel I'm a bad Christian if I don't attend.

Last night I was at Summit for about 10 minutes when I thought I didn't want to be there. So I left.

I had the wrong motivation to go and I didn't want to be forced to be there.

God was in that night and I had an opportunity to have a productive conversation with a couple girls who live in the townhouses.

I talked to them about how I am deeply intimate with God but I seek superficiality in my friendships and relationships simply because I don't trust people.

If God is truly calling me to a speaker for this generation, I must move beyond my fear of being vulnerable and transparent.

I must let people in: to see where I truly am.

That is difficult. I don't want people to see my struggles, to see me in my weakness. All I want them to see is how I am strong in God.

That's all they really need to know. My relationship with God is private and as long as I'm doing okay, then I have no reason to share what God is doing in me.

The fact is, I'm crazy passionate and I want everyone to see that but I don't want (or haven't found a way) to vocalize what God is doing in my life.

For HIS renown,

~Susie