Freedom in Risks

Before I came back to IWU for the spring semester I realized something changed how I view my relationship with God. I wrote in my journal: "God is bigger than my life."

I didn't realize the significance of that single statement:

God is bigger than my life.

Then the statement I wrote began to convict me. How often do I limit God because of my own insecurities?

I get motivated to do something I care deeply about and before I know it I think, "I could never do that" or "Someone else can do it." And I get discouraged before I even start anything.

Then I began to process the scope of God and me.

I'm nothing in comparison to God.

But the amazing thing is He turns me into something He values.

Because I know I am valuable in His sight, I began to think, "God is in everything I do that is within His will."

Wow.

I can be confident that God is in everything I do when I seek to ask, "God what is your place in this?"

This applies right now.

About a month ago I submitted my resume to "Reach your City" which I wrote about in my last post. I hadn't heard back so I was motivated to call them and see what was going on with my resume and if they had made a decision regarding my resume.

That involved a risk.

I'm learning if I truly want to live by faith I must take risks.

I believe there are freedoms in the risks I take in faith, knowing God will see me through to what is best for me. Although, I may not see it right away.

I keep going...because there is freedom in risks.

peace-

Nashville

It's late (sort of) and I should be studying, not writing my blog.

But I have some things on my heart that I wanted to share.

For the last few years (since 2007) I have wanted to go into music promotion (booking bands and scheduling concerts). Since high school I've had a passion for music and now I was determined to pursue it as my career :-)

This past summer I researched music promotion jobs and there all in Nashville. When I think of the city of Nashville, I automatically think of country music.

Not exactly the place I would ever feel called to go.

Well, I wrote in my journal last July (I think) committing the possibility of moving to Nashville to prayer.

I don't think about it that often. Honestly I'm not obsessed or anything about going to Tennessee or Nashville.

I'm open to going anywhere.

So last week I got this random email from "Reach Your City" an outreach organization based in, you guessed it, Nashville, which I think was completely God-sent. I thought, I wonder if they offer summer internships.

They do.

So I applied for an internship this summer.

I might be going to Nashville and whenever I think about that, I get crazy excited.

I'm waiting to hear back and my fingers are crossed.

peace-

There and Back Again

Last May I got into some things that I shouldn't have in regards to relationships. To make a long story short, I was talking inappropriately to guys as a way for me to deal with some pain. I kept saying "I'll be able to see myself out of it. No problem." Then I would just run back into the same thing over and over again.

I was held in my own personal captivity that I thought I would never be free from. I was in this captivity for months when I finally fell. I had a mindset that said, "I have only one life. I want to do whatever I want." So I put myself in a situation where I went too far.

This was a week before Christmas. My thoughts led me to believe I needed to rely on myself to get out of this sin that held me captive.

I also had the perspective that my strength would be enough for me to break free from my captivity and sin. It wasn't.

So Christmas day approached and my perspective changed completely.

I wrote in my journal: "Christmas is about Jesus' presence in my life. I have only one life to live completely for God."

That hit me. Hard.

I then realized I could never rely on my human strength to get me out of sin that lingered for nearly a year. I journaled a prayer asking God to give me the strength to overcome this. He did. He set me free from everything that dragged me down.

Then I came back to IWU. I was paranoid everyone was going to be judgmental of me. No one was. Everyone was like, "whatever." I thought my friends would be asking, "What happened to you?" And my response will be, "God happened."

I am completely amazed at the work God did in my life. I was in all this sin that I thought I would never see the end of and God pulled me out of it.

God taught me to rely on His strength, not my own.

I also want to share what I recently wrote in my journal: "The weaknesses of this life lead me straight to God. In Him is strength that continues daily. Apart from Him is only my strength, which in reality, is really weakness."

I want you to be encouraged that the strength of God can break chains of captivity that human strength never could.

peace-